July 2007
71 posts
2 tags
Juno
A solid soundtrack
Quick dialogue, a new voice
Pregnant home-skillet.
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RoboCop
He was a good cop
Detroit needed a great one
Cyborg with a gun.
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The Heartbreak Kid
Rushed into marriage
Man’s wife ‘flips the switch’ big time
Where did Mary go?
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Michael Clayton
George Clooney can act?
Normally he plays Clooney
Here, he is brilliant.
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We Own The Night
Black sheep, cop family
When everything goes to hell
The blood runs thicker.
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Robin Hood: Prince Of Thieves
Of bows and arrows
With mullets and weird accents
Bryan Adams’ song.
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There Will Be Blood
The Daniel Day Show
Cold-hearted bastard ages
I drink your milk shake!
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Shoot 'Em Up
Outrageous violence
Clive, Giamatti can’t save
Guns are cool and fun.
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Sunshine
A final sunset
A journey to good sci-fi
2001-kind.
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Atonement
A young sister’s mind
She tricks herself into lies
And ruins two lives.
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Dragon Wars
Giant snake dragons
Leisure suit news reporters
Which ones look cooler?
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Once
A street singer sings
Lures a muse and new bandmate
They create music.
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Lions For Lambs
A summoned writer
A summoned student, they both
Listen to some spin.
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Gone Baby Gone
Ben’s turn to direct
Makes Casey a great actor
Too many endings.
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Stardust
Do not cross the wall
There are witches, star people,
And gay DeNiros.
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No Country For Old Men
Flips the coin, call it
You can run, but he’ll find you
You can’t hide from him.
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National Treasure: Book Of Secrets
A city of gold
A last name run through the mud
Which one drives Ben Gates?
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Shattered
Remember Derailed?
Pretty much the same movie
With different actors.
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Interview
Skulking reporter
Over his head with actress
Goes for the story.
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The Hustler
Eddie is too fast
But can’t get the best of Fats
Has no character.
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The Golden Compass
Better Narnia
Cosmic dust, giant bear fight
Worse Lord of the Rings.
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The Color Of Money
Fast Eddie sells booze
Finds a cocksure protege
Hustles his way back.
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The Kingdom
It’s like Michael Mann
But really not quite as good
It’s like Peter Berg.
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Hitman
Movie based on game
But no Uwe Boll around
So not quite as bad.
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Eastern Promises
Russian mob driver
His life told through his tattoos
Badly wants his stars.
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I Am Legend
One man and his dog
Thousand fake-looking zombies
Seeing less is more.
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Planet Terror
Zombies, gore galore
Possibly even too much
The gun-leg is cool.
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I Now Pronounce You Check & Larry
Two dudes get married
Two hours of pure gay jokes
Two real laughs too few.
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Rescue Dawn
In enemy hands
One man knows he can escape
But the jungle waits.
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We Are Marshall
When tragedy strikes
Football appears just a game
Playing is winning.
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The Wind That Shakes The Barley
Two brothers in arms
One wants no fight, other does
In truce, roles reverse.
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Beowulf
3D epic poem
Glasses off, not as epic
I am Beowulf!
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Mr. Brooks
The voice in your head
Costner’s in a good movie?
He makes a killing.
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Fantastic Four: Rise Of The Silver Surfer
The same bad humor
Mixed with some sleek new effects
A lesser X-Men.
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Glengarry Glen Ross
Over-worked, tired
But coffee is for closers
They get the good leads.
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American Gangster
Drugs, guns, homicide
Corruption, extortion, this
Is America.
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The Number 23
A 100-scale
I’d have to give this movie
A 23 grade.
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The Hoax
A so-so writer
Conjures up a great story
A so-so movie.
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Live Free Or Die Hard
Ridiculous name
A few ridiculous scenes
Die Hard 4 still rocks!
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Black Book
A bad soap opera
Backdrop of the Holocaust
People like this trash?
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Home Of The Brave
Back home from the war
Vets struggle to readjust
In cliched plot lines.
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Perfect Stranger
The pervert’s online
False names and fake avatars
And where is Balki?
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The Ex
Handicap joke time
Where has Charles Grodin been?
Where’s Zach Braff going?
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Death Proof
A complete throw-back
Heavy on the dialogue
And light on the plot.
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Next
I see the future
Took one look at this movie
And knew it would suck.
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Elizabeth
A fair maiden queen
Goes all Michael Corleone
Reborn Virgin Queen.
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3:10 To Yuma
Western is not dead
Good actors are just needed
Crowe quick and deadly.
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Superbad
Young kids posturing
Really they’re just scared inside
Things get out of hand.
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The Lives Of Others
Lonely man listens
His once evil heart dissolves
He becomes human.
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Fracture
Cocksure attorney
Versus arrogant old man
Will wrongs be made right?