November 2006
45 posts
2 tags
Idiocracy
There’s stupidity
That borders banality
Ruins idea.
2 tags
Beerfest
The guy from Das Boot
Forced to watch Americans
Drink from the das boot.
2 tags
Crank
A 90-minute
Melding of Speed, GTA
Whew! I’m exhausted.
2 tags
Pan's Labyrinth
Down the rabbit hole
Ofelia escapes nightmare
In a haunting world.
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Jackass Number Two
It’s most disturbing,
Most disgusting, and yet you
Cannot help but watch.
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All The King's Men
And to keep power
Very fine lines must be walked
And dirt must be dug.
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The Devil Wears Prada
The white-haired devil
She throws her coats and insults
But deep down, she cares.
2 tags
Wall Street
Bud Fox sells his soul
The Devil, Gordon Gekko
Filthy rich devil.
2 tags
My Super Ex-Girlfriend
Take all the best parts
Of a superhero film
And subtract them all.
2 tags
Employee Of The Month
Jessica Simpson
She domesticates Dane Cook
He gets a gold star.
2 tags
Top Gun
Maverick says ‘That’s right,
Ice…man, I am dangerous”
Iceman simply CHOMPS.
2 tags
Scoop
Woody, Scarlett make
The satirical Match Point
But it’s not as good.
2 tags
The Libertine
The depressing tale
A sexual deviant
With a dirty mouth.
2 tags
Babel
Communication,
Lack thereof drives people mad
Violence transcends.
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MirrorMask
Visually stunning
Makes a mother-daughter feud
Very watchable.
2 tags
Children Of Men
In your face, brutal
Like the ringing in Clive’s ears
Far away yet real.
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Snakes On A Plane
Not quite bad enough
Too ironic for cult film
Too bad Sam Jackson.
2 tags
Total Recall
Arnold goes to Mars
But is he only dreaming?
Ask bald stomach thing.
2 tags
Invincible
Wahlberg as Rudy
In Rocky meets The Rookie
But with Papale.
2 tags
World Trade Center
What’s with all the stars?
This is 9/11 not
Ocean’s 11.
2 tags
First Blood
Disrespected, hurt
John Rambo goes guerrilla
Dennehy, no match.
2 tags
The Good Shepherd
The WASP men control
With secrets, lies, and deceit
And a lot of hats.
2 tags
Lady In The Water
Critics dislike film
Where wolf-like thing eats pompous,
Annoying critic.
2 tags
Fearless
Arrogant Jet Li
Becomes the humble Jet Li
Still kicks all asses.
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Rocky III
Sleek, marketable
Apollo helps Rock find his
Eye of the tiger.
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Rocky IV
Nature vs. machine
America vs. Russia
Rocky breaks Drago.
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The Black Dahlia
Same author, town, feel
As L.A. Confidential
Not nearly as good.
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Rocky V
Rocky turns trainer
Neglects his annoying son
His ring’s in the street.
2 tags
Prime
Uma goes younger
A movie by Ben Younger
On Jewish mothers.
2 tags
The Illusionist
Like the orange tree grows
Paul Giamatti does shrink
Ed Norton is back.
2 tags
Rocky II
Rocky gets a job
Rocky gets a book, a tan
Rocky gets rematch.
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Rocky
Hey yo Adrian
Rocky says to his woman
Heart of the movie.
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Superman Returns
Comes back from Krypton
In pursuit of Lois Lane
Lifts up heavy things.
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A Scanner Darkly
Only Downey tops
Keanu undercover
In the scramble suit.
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Talladega Nights
Praise Baby Jesus!
But this is no Anchorman
Praise John C. Reilly!
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Little Miss Sunshine
It’s hard to believe
Steve Carell is the same guy
That played Brick Tamland.
2 tags
An Inconvenient Truth
Al Gore, mad as hell
With talk of Global Warming
Heating up the room.
2 tags
The Fountain
Visually stunning
Years from now, still, it will stand
Immortality.
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Pirates Of The Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest
Ahoy Captain Jack!
Where did ye humor travel?
Davy Jones’ locker?
2 tags
You, Me And Dupree
That Owen Wilson
Such a likable yuckster
Always the same role.
2 tags
American Dreamz
The message is clear:
America is stupid…
…for making this film.
2 tags
The Lake House
Decent idea
Back and forth letters ruin
They’re better in Speed.
2 tags
Miami Vice
Where are the pastels?
Replaced by total darkness
And a fu-manchu.
2 tags
Tequila Sunrise
There’s one cop, one crook
Two friends in love with one girl,
Sexy jazz music.
2 tags
The Proposition
Australian western
Trumps American western
At least recently.